ALASDAIR DUNCAN catches up with REBECCA SPARROW to talk about her latest book, a collection of motivation and inspiration for teenage readers called Find Your Tribe (And Nine Other Things I Wish I’d Known In High School).

Brisbane writer Rebecca Sparrow made her debut in 2003 with The Girl Most Likely, a tale of a former high achiever in the throes of a quarter-life crisis. Teenage audiences embraced the book and its heroine Rachel, and girls began emailing her in their droves, sharing their own experiences and, to her great surprise, asking for advice. Sparrow began to take on motivational speaking gigs, addressing high school students on the subjects of resilience, perseverance and self-esteem, but it took the birth of her own daughter, Ava, to make her realise her next great ambition – a frank, funny book of life advice aimed at teenage girls, the kind of thing she never had growing up.

ALASDAIR DUNCAN: What’s the significance of the title Find Your Tribe?

REBECCA SPARROW:  There’s a famous book called Queen Bees And Wannabes that talks about the different cliques at a school, and why, if you can, you shouldn’t bow to pressure and try to be part of the cool group, but aim to do your own thing and be friends with everyone. As an extension of that, my book goes into the idea that a huge part of whether you enjoy high school or not is determined by the decisions you make, and the people you choose to hang out with. High school is hard enough without hanging with a group of people who are going to talk about you behind your back and make you miserable. If you choose the right friends – genuine, loyal friends who really care about you – your experience is going to be that much better.

AD: I was really taken with the blunt, conversational tone of Find Your Tribe – why was it important to you to write the book in this way?

RS: Well, I just thought that there was no other way to approach it. I wrote it all the way I would say it – if my daughter comes up to me in ten or twelve years and started asking questions about sex or drugs, this is the way I would explain those things to her. I just think that knowledge is power. For example, STIs are on the rise all over the place, because there’s a lack of information and knowledge. There are a lot of parents out there who are telling their kids this stuff, and a lot who aren’t, so I wanted to write a book that explains this stuff in a tone that hopefully doesn’t come across as preachy.

AD: I understand that a lot of the concerns you address in the book are ones that have come from your readers, too?

RS: A twelve year-old girl emailed me recently and said that girls in her class were sending naked photos of themselves to guys. What they don’t get is that a photo lives forever – it doesn’t go away. That worries me. I just think that if girls are armed with some information, if they’re ever in a situation where someone is pressuring them, they’re going to be armed with some knowledge. 

AD: You have input from some really interesting people in the book, including Poh Ling Yeow – how did you get her involved?

RS: Well, it was really dead easy. I emailed her through the art gallery where a lot of her work is shown, and she replied within a couple of hours, and then we started going back and forth. She was brilliant. When you look at someone like Poh, she’s intelligent and funny and an amazing artist and a fabulous cook, and she’s beautiful, and when somebody like that says ‘god, I hated myself when I was at school, and all I wanted to do was look like one of the blonde Australian girls’, it goes to show that if you’re having a miserable experience and you don’t feel like you’re fitting in, it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you.

AD: You’ve dedicated the book to your daughter –are you a little bit terrified about what’s in store for her when she grows up and gets to high school age?

RS: I just block it out! Honestly though, I can’t start worrying about it now, because the issues and the technology in ten years’ time will be completely different. All I can do is try to raise a child who has high enough self-esteem that she doesn’t bow to peer pressure, and she understands about consequences. My daughter might pick up the book in twelve years time and just roll her eyes though – who knows?

FIND YOUR TRIBE (AND NINE OTHER THINGS I WISH I’D KNOWN IN HIGH SCHOOL) is out now through UQP, RRP $14.95. Go to www.rebeccasparrow.com for more information.

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